Oh my God she is stupider than I ever imagined!

I saw something strange on Google news this morning, let me share.

Below is a picture of some meat. Okay the meat is sort of arranged in a manner that represents an item of clothing. A form of protest perhaps? Animal rights groups bringing awareness to the plight of animal lives we, as humans, so shamelessly exploit.

Think again, this item of ‘clothing’ belongs to someone. It isn’t a museum or exhibition piece either. This person actually wore the meat. I’ll give you one guess...

Yup you guessed it. Lady GAGA!!!

How the hell can she wear something like THAT (look at the hat and boots… *sigh*) and STILL walk around looking smug with that ‘I’m so original and popular’ look on her face!? She defended the meat dress by saying "If we don't stand up for what we believe in, if we don't fight for our rights, pretty soon we're going to have as many rights as the meat on our bones" (I interpret that as “I’m fighting for my right to be a crazy woman, if sane people have rights so should us crazy lot. VIVA CRAZY VIVA, PHANSI SANITY PHANSI!”). Remember, this is the same woman that said she refused to have sex because her creative juices would be sucked out of her vagina!

Gaga went on to saying something along the lines of “It’s the same as wearing leather…” (and I say “Listen Gaga, it just isn’t… you’re a complete nutter”)

Rant about headlines

I’m really surprised at the shocking headlines I’ve seen recently in the news. Either desperate measures used by journalists to attract the attention of stupid people or stupid journalist not thinking about what they write while they are going about their business…

Let me explain:

Earlier this week there was a news headline with the following

“Corpses left to rot underground!”

I mean REALLY, do they honestly expect us to react something along these lines “How horrific! How could someone possibly have stooped so low as to leave corpses to ROT! UNDERGROUND!??? That evil son-of-a-femaledog. I hope he/she burns in hell for carrying out such an inhuman act. IN HELL!!!” Give the people some credit I say. How odd would it be if we didn’t leave corpses to rot underground… “Look honey, the neighbours dog died, judging from the smell and maggots it must have kicked the bucket around 3 weeks ago. I really wish he’d scooped it up and left it at the corpse pile on the corner of 5^th and Cathcart.”

Nay, the person that originally thought of burying corpses was a genius… a headline like that should be followed by picture of a man with a spade standing triumphantly at the side of newly covered grave.

The next headline was quite recent news on the radio (today if I’m not mistaken) “Miners shot by security guards after found digging for gold”. That’s a raw deal in my opinion, the last time I checked digging for gold was part of the job description. Were they innocently working before some trigger happy guard came along and shot them to pieces or were they hiding nuggets up their asses?

A few weeks back there was even a report of a Boeing 767 crash landing at Harare International Airport. The world looked on in panic as people started pointing fingers and checking flight details of family members… all until we read the full report (a day later) detailing a 767 crash-land TRAINING EXERCISE!

These sorts of things can so easily be taken the wrong way. If it’s all about getting people talking and making a fuss over stuff that ends up being really trivial, I don’t think it’s worth it at all. In my opinion, if ones story is boring, being vague and lying about it to be popular is rather juvenile. People that write news reports in this manner should be forced to swallow broken lightbulbs.

So there…

In the news today... Dodos

Two parties are fighting over custody of the worlds last dodo egg. The egg is currently being held by the East London Museum (SA). They were loaned the egg 65 years ago by the Courney-Latimer family of Mauritius and decided not to give it back...


The museum director claims the egg, worth one million rands (+-100.000 USD), as museum property based on, and I quote "...What makes it important is the length of time it has been with us..." or in other words, "we stole it so long ago that it should now belong to us by default".



Failing to come up with something intelligent to say, SABC news reported "Dodo's are extinct and the chances of another egg making its way into the public domain are slim"...


...YOU THINK~!