And another thing about school...

Back when I was in grade 8 we started a new subject at school. It was called Counseling. For those unfamiliar with the subject, it’s basically one of those useless ‘voyage of self discovery’ subjects that us scholars listed under the broader ‘Fartarse subjects’ category. It didn’t take much for a subject to fall into the fartarse category, the criteria were simple:

1- No studying required 2- Walkover teachers (the kind you …well, walk all over…) 3- No exams 4- Lots of group work 5- Minor contribution to ones report card

A few other subjects that I considered fartarse were religion, history of art, computers, art and sports (all sports… no exceptions). I’m drifting… in any case back in Counseling classes, we were encouraged to think out of the box. In scenario X your preferred response would be ‘______’ (insert well thought out answer here). We’d answer a whole bunch of random questions after which our scores would be tallied and we were placed into categories similar to the fashion in which a farmer would grade his… potatoe crop for sale to different markets (hmm… struggling to think of a nice analogy here).

These magical categories were supposed to give you a better idea of the carrier path you wanted to take. For example, Jane scores xxx points! Well done Jane you are an Eagle/Ant/Fish/Dungbeetle. You should become a Doctor/Accountant/Social Worker/Plumber… Good luck with that! Byebye!


WTF!


It just pissed me off. Who was the arrogant piece of kaka that came up with this system and why did this person think that they could predict and guide the life of a 13 year old towards success by asking random questions and scoring us on our answers! We were kids, we had dreams, we had something to look forward to and that was already the best incentive for working hard and reaching our goals! Everything was going fine till we took your Satan spawn questionnaire and some A’hole decided “No, you wouldn’t make a very good aircraft pilot, maybe consider working 8 to 5, six days a week behind a desk in a small office counting stuff…”. GRRR!!!

Go AWAY! Just LEAVE! …and take your stupid questionnaire with you sadistic, dream shattering Hitleresque commie’ bastard!

If you are a kid reading this post (or adult that has fallen for that commie’ bastards trickery) take my advice: You have a brain! Just do what you want to and don’t let other people (especially those who haven’t a clue who you are) have an effect on your life decisions. If you don’t know what it is you want, simply pursue the truth… the rest will follow.

When I grow up...

I wonder how many adults actually become what they wanted to be when they were kids?

We all had a vision of ourselves as adults when we were kids. Some profession that was very appealing to us when we first realised that we would have to do some sort of work in the future.

Mine changed several times as I grew up. The process of deciding what I wanted to do with my life all started after visiting the Durban aquarium with my family. My sister and I were really thrilled by the dolphin show and shortly after being splashed by Flipper (I can't remember his real name) we both decided that we would become... wait for it... Dolphin trainers. Yipee! What fun!

This lasted about a year. In that time my sister and I would constantly bicker about who was the first to decide to become a dolphin trainer and try to convince the other not to do the job (so we could have the dolphins all to ourselves). Eventually I backed off, there were plenty of other cool jobs way better than training dolphins (sobs...). I now had to decide on a new future job. Fortunately my parents took us for an air show and in doing so inspired new hope in my young mind.

I would become... a pilot. Woohoo! Take that sis. Flying aeroplanes in stunts and seeing the world from the heavens would keep me occupied for a long time to come. I remember spending hours fantasizing about all the destinations I would visit. I would even deliberately take the the long route on my walk home from religion classes so I could fly my model aeroplane on 'secret spy missions'.

I also recall wanting to become a toy designer and even a cartoonist in my early teens. These were never really obsessions though. The next obsession was car mechanic. I have a really cool uncle who always visited us with his restored old muscle cars and racing tweaked autos. Alas I was now a teenager and my parents wouldn't even consider me studying towards becoming a grease monkey...

I have a theory. I'm sure the individuals who stuck it out and became what they originally set out to be when they were kids are now the happiest adults. When we are young we express ourselves without thinking about consequences. "That's what I'll do, It'll be fun". This childish impulse is probably a better indication of who we are and what we should do with our lives than a well thought out career path made by a brainwashed grade 10 pupil.

Okay the theory has its flaws, I doubt many kids dream about becoming an accountant and many will be disappointed after finding out that they can't work for Santa Clause. You have to admit though, there is something to this...

I guess I need to chat to someone who has pulled it off.