Tuesday, May 12, 2009

EEbEE’s Top 5 most annoying artists

I occasionally get exposed the commercial crap that people listen to these days on MTV or VH1. I’ve developed a particular dislike of some artists and the banshee like qualities of the tracks they produce. I’ve compiled a list of my top 5 most annoying.


Number 5: Tied between Nickelback and Britney Spears


To me Nickelback is all that is wrong with rock music these days. These are guys that I feel make music to make money. There is no heart and soul behind their tracks. Nickelback shamelessly exploits nauseating teenagers that want to be popular with other nauseating teenagers. It’s a vicious cycle that generates lots of money and has nothing to do with music any more. If I had my way, each Nickelback band member would be tied to the bottom of a white water raft which would then be sent down some shallow rapids partially inflated.

Nickelback

Britney Spears is a disgrace to modern society and women in general. If you want evidence, listen to one of her songs. If you are feeling particularly brave watch the music video as well.






















The Britney


Number 4: John Legend


I’m convinced that this man is either a robot or a vegetable of some kind (potatoe?). He shows no emotions, has a monotone voice and all his songs are pretty much exactly the same. This would be fine if the songs were any good. Unfortunately, they are appalling. I presume they are all love songs judging from the amount of times he says ‘Stay’ and ‘Baby’. I also presume that the songs reflect on his personal life. All the girls that try to make out with him probably leave promptly after finding out they are being seduced by a humanoid vegetable. His popularity is more than likely an indication of the large number of ‘veggie people’ posing as humans out there….

Scary!





















Number 3: Katey Perry


I’m sure that you have all come across someone along the long road of life that immediately annoyed the hell out of you. You know that face you would single out in the crowd for a good thrashing for no particular reason. Katey Perry is one of the people that fits into this category for me. Everything about her just makes me want to barf. I honestly don’t think she is a bad person, I just can’t handle her and consequently her music. Am I the only person that feels this way?


























I don’t want this post to be too long so I’m going to leave the final two most annoying for later. Try guess who they are.


7 comments:

Helen said...

First comment!!!

EEbs, you can NOT leave me on a cliffhanger like that! I must admit, Nickelback annoys me too, they're so "Pretty boy Rocker"ish you know? Like their manager found them in a box of cereal (just add milk).

As for the rest, I don't listen to the radio for a reason (no, not just that I have weird taste in music)and so I was mercifully unaware of a bunch of those until quite recently anyway!

who are the other two? TELL US!!!

sarah said...

i actually like katy perry! gasp! her songs are catchy :p do you hate me now? will you refuse to talk to me again???

i HATE katie melua... or however you spell her name. she is stupid and her voice is NOT GOOD

Luke said...

AMEN about Nickleback! I have never found a more tedious band to listen to in all my life...except for maybe Coldplay...

I think Rihanna has to be in your top two! As for the other...Jay-Z? Or maybe Akon...Wow, he annoys me so much! Sounds like a child throwing a tantrum to a beat!

EEbEE said...

Sorry for the cliff hangar helen. I normally have a word limit on my posts. simply because i don't want people to get bored with my style of writing (I feel that it's quite predictable actually).

Oh and I don't hate anyone for having bad taste in music :)
I just see it as potential to rip on them. cannon fodder if you must.
(but seriously. Life would suck if everyone had the same taste, we would all loose our identities).
As for Katie melua, My grandma likes her music (she honestly does). Out of respect for my dear old Granny i will refrain from any negative commentary.

Luke brings up artists that are def in the top 10. But are they in the top 2???

Jessica Jane said...

How about the Simpsom sisters - Jessica and Ashlee?? They're pretty damn lame... (pity I share a first name with one of them...)

junaid said...

i don't care who your top 2 are - coz NOTHING's worse than nickelback!

alos, people need to stop hating on katie melua - it's because of her that I know there are 9 million bicycles in beijing - that's a fact...and i'm sure i would have learnt a lot more if i did not fall asleep everytime i hear her music.

EEbEE said...

I keep a nickelback album on my pc just so i can delete a song to cheer me up when i'm in a bad mood.

*click*
*Shift+del*

gone forever!!!! HAHAHAHAAAAA!!!

I'd agree with you in that Katie Melua songs are quite educational Junaid. At least more educational than Britney screaming 'Give me More! Give me Give me more..' for 3 and a half minutes.